Monday, January 16, 2012

Goodbye, My Love

No, not The Writer.  Muthafuckin' CHEESE...

A couple weeks back, I posted about some of my goals in my new found Twenty-Nine-dom.  Well, now that I have a hot new man, the part about taking better care of myself physically is just a tad more critical to me.  Don't get me wrong, I am pretty content with my figure and have been for most of my adult life.  But like everything in this world, there is always room for improvement.

I also stated in that post how much I miss my yogi and mountain girl lifestyle.  My biggest obstacle in kicking my ass into gear is fucking exhaustion.  I am keeping fairly good on my promise to get more sleep.  But the crap I have been ingesting is leaving me feeling perpetually full and sluggish.  To give some background, I have been an ovo-lacto-pescatarian for many years now.  (I personally think the use of those words sound so self-fulfilling, but my self righteous vegetarian friends enjoy the pastime of smugly correcting me if I identify as a majority veggie.)  Basically, I abstain from all animal flesh and it's parts with the occasional exception of fish.  I also eat eggs and dairy.

A little over 2 years ago, I veganized my diet a bit more by removing all dairy sans the occasional cheesy treat.  Good fuck, I love cheese.  On this more vegan(ed) diet, I felt fucking fabulous.  I seemed to shed a little extra padding without even trying.  I was strong and fit. And I had the energy of an ADHD 4 year old hopped up on meth.  After a good year or so, those more desirable habits eventually fell to the wayside to busy life, depression and the fact that all the phytoestrogens in my mass consumption of soy milk turned me into a fucking Gila Monster...hopped up on meth. 

Inspired by one of my favorite (and fucking hilarious) bloggers, HauteMess, I made the executive decision that it's time for another go.  It's my last year in my 20's and godfuckingdammit, I'm going to be hot for it.  So here's the gist:
  • Cutting out all dairy, except for the occasional, cheesy, beautiful, and special moment 
  • This time, I am giving other alternative milks a whirl.  No soy induced estrogen monster for me, please.  Picked up some coconut milk to try.  
  • After my morning coffee that I won't leave my bed without, switching onto green tea when I need a hot caffeine filled beverage.  This especially to take advantage of its metabolism boosting properties.
  • The dreaded "Handful of Almonds" for when I am craving cheese but know it's just because I want something to put in my fat fucking mouth.  I really have nothing against almonds.  I pretty much love them.  But as a good foodie I'm embarrassed to type handful of almonds.
  • Plenty of eggs.  Of course, not vegan but full of protein and good stuff.  I don't feel suffering when I eat the embryos of chickens.  So long as their mamas were free range and happy.
  • Even more plenty fruit and veg as snacks.  Because I fucking love them.  That's why.  Oh, and they're good for me.  And I can eat as much as I want.
  • Only eating bread or pasta or any sort of wheat product if it's 100% whole wheat
  • More painful than limiting cheese, limiting my micro-brew consumption.  I grabbed a Bota Box of some Malbec for the at-home imbibe.  Because going completely alcohol free is not an option.
As a food lover and someone who enjoys creative cooking, I do not expect this to be terribly awful. Pretty much exactly what I did a couple years ago but with replacing the soy milk.  I wouldn't want The Writer to have to endure the wrath.  Speaking of that handsome devil, he is going on a new food plan himself.  All meat and cheese.  This should be interesting.

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